"For $45 You Better Tell Me Something!!"- Chris Tucker

Today is the first entry I am going to write that is is apart of a philosophy I call, "Interviewing the Elephant." Its where I talk about the things no one wants to talk about. You know, the elephant in the room.

I am going to dive right in, and keep it 100. Expectations in a relationship. The quote from the movie Rush Hour, Chris Tucker is demanding he get some REAL information since he gave the guy $45 and is EXPECTING some results from that. Now there are many things to speak on so the first thing I will bring to your attention is rewardzone. If anyone shops at Best Buy, then you know rewardzone is a program to where every dollar you spend equals a point. Gain so many points, you get money back in the mail and qualify for special offers. Now ask yourself, "what are the benefits of my rewardzone program?" We all do things in a relationship that we feel proves our love and affection for our mate. We buy gifts, take you places, stand by you on good, and bad, decisions, and so on. We put in work, as the young kids say. But what if that kinda work is a required? Is there even a reward for that kind of work? How do you measure what's over and beyond and whats expected? Because over and beyond gets you promoted at the job, doing whats expected just keeps you getting a paycheck. Gotta put in some overtime if you want some better results.

Lets continue with this rewardzone idea for a moment. In rewardzone, it requires currency to purchase things, but not everything you purchase is worth any points, only "tangible items." Tangible is defined as having actual physical existence...therefore being capable of assigning value [to it]. Whats expected in a relationship first of all comes from whats valued. How much currency to you really have to be able to buy something tangible in someone's rewardzone? Is what you are bringing to the table on a daily basis substantial? Loyalty is a huge reward in my book. If you stick by me through the good and the bad, put up with my attitude, and all that comes to follow, you get double the points. I reward people based off the moments that count, the little things you know. When I am at work and I have no money because I forgot my wallet so you buy me food. Thats love! When i open the door for you in the car and you reach over and unlike mine, THATS LOVE! Thats what I reward. Not the fancy dinner, or the birthday gifts, (unless its something I REALLY like), or anything TRADITIONAL. You have to do something outside the box to get my points. 

Lets take another example I spoke on a while ago. Mixing friends with your mate. On the one hand, she introduces all her male friends to her boyfriend and they all cool, even sometimes talk on the phone. But the boyfriend doesn't introduce ALL her male friends and keeps some distant because its not a good idea to mix the two. The girlfriend becomes jealous, demands to know the mysterious person, and uses the fact that she introduces all her friends, so why can't you!? What if the guy doesnt care about meeting ALL of your friends? You will never know unless you ask. You cannot expect him to do the things you do to show love if thats not what he feels defines love.

I reward when you do something out of the ordinary, like bring me a present on a random tuesday, or cook me Cinnamon banana pancakes because you know I have been craving them. Doing things to show you are listening to me. Now do not come and try to attack me saying, "Well, I do this, this, and this, for him and he doesn't even appreciate it!" How we ever stopped to try and figure out whats actually important to the person we are serving? She expects certain undiscussed actions because we are in a relationship. Just like women expect that after 4-5 years of dating, YOU, not her, YOU are going to pop the question with a Diamond ring to solidify the purity and sincerity of your request! The saying goes, "you get what you pay for." Well how about you get what you work for. 

So hop up out the bed and turn your swag on, then you can have the things you feel you deserve.

"Bitter"

"And he overthrew those cities, and all the plain, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and that which grew upon the ground....But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt."

We all like to focus on the future, when our present seems so dark. The future can be that one distant star of hope, brightly shining as dim as a weakened candle. While holding on to the future's reward is often the tylenol of enduring the present heartache, for a moment I want to talk about the Ghost of our own past.

In the story, Lot and his family was spared from the destruction of Sodom and Gomorra. As the verse says, she turns around and becomes a pillar of salt. I want to bring a much deeper meaning to that verse. Looking back into your past and wishing it was still your present, or regretting the changes you have made, or just simply being bitter about the things that happen, will destroy your future. It will leave you planted in the same position eternally until you decide to look forward to your future, instead of falling backwards into your past.

"And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape for thy life; look not behind thee, neither stay thou in all the plain; escape to the mountain, lest thou be consumed."

When God relays a message to you from someone else, make sure you are listening. It may not always be what you want it to be, but its for your own benefit. God told Lots family not to look back and to escape to the mountains where you can not be consumed. God wants to take you to the highest place, spritually so that you will be above all the things that come to harm you. And when I say above, I mean not only physically, but spiritually. So when someone forms a weapon against you, if you are in Gods will and his grace, you will know that it shall not prosper against you. And not only will you rise above it, you will be reborn in him so you will not be bitter towards that person because you are higher mentally. In fact, you will pray for that person and that they find God.

Looking back into your past with "wishful thinking" will cloud your future. Looking back will even sometimes have you bitter towards God because you miss some of the things you had you feel may have actually had some good in it. Let me break down the difference between "good" and "God." Good is a four letter word that looks like God with the letter O being replicated. But there is only one God, and he cannot be duplicated, though he is often imitated. God is a three letter word, which is a prime number so it can only be divided by the number one and itself. Since God is the alpha and omega, the beginning and the end, so the only thing that can divide(serparate) you from him is Himself. He is number one. Thats why the things that are good are not always God, but the things that are God are always good.

When God gives you something, he does not take it away. And even if he does, its because he is upgrading you for your obedience. So do not look back into your past wanting some things to return to your present. The only time we should be thinking about the past is when we are thanking God for our present and that he brought us out of destruction. God wants your future to be on a high mountain, filled with milk and honey. Far from destruction, and closer to the heavens with him. But first you have to listen to him when he is calling, and you have to climb that mountain. Trust me I know, going up that mountain is painful, tiring, and streneous to the body.

God can put you through so much you become bitter towards him because life was easier when you were on your own it seems like. He will make you want to give up, but you can't. You must have faith in him. Because when you are done climbing, your legs and calf muscles are stronger so you can walk through life and stand your ground without getting knocked down. Your arms are stronger so you can fight against tricks of the enemy. And finally you will be in a place where you are so close to God its like you can see him and talk to him personally. Its like He is in the room with you, talking back to you as you pray. He wants you so high up that even if someone does come to attack you, they will be fatigued from all the hard work it takes to even try and harm you, and they will be easily defeated with your new strength!

That is why God tells you not to look back, because there is so much in front of you, just need to move forward. When you look back with bitterness, you become a statue, planted at that place in that moment, never seeing the future God has in store for you.